This Little Death
by here's some fudge
Summary: A question from Bella to Edward turns into a dare. A very, very delicious dare. Oneshot lemon, complete.


**Summary:** A question from Bella to Edward turns into a dare. A very, very delicious dare. Edward/Bella. Oneshot lemon, complete.

**Rated: **Mature for sexual content.

**A/N:** For the most part this could be inserted into Breaking Dawn's honeymoon, but I wrote it with the intention of ignoring Breaking Dawn and going with my own imagination-devised honeymoon for E/B, which is in Alaska rather than Isle Esme and they find creative ways to get around being unable to have sex. Keep that in mind.

*****

Of all the things he could have asked me, he had to pull _this_ one out of the hat. I shouldn't have expected any less, but to tell you the truth, it had blindsided me.

I was still recovering.

My conversation with Edward had gone something like:

"You're kidding me."

"Do I look like I am?"

"I don't know, you bluff pretty well."

"I'm not kidding, Bella."

"I.. You're.. dead serious about this?" At the time, in the right context, 'dead serious' wasn't a pun. For once, I wasn't subjecting him to bad jokes.

I, naturally, had ended up agreeing in the end. Why, and how? Reflecting so soon was a little premature for my taste, I enjoyed avoiding explaining myself until I was forced to, but a subconscious part of me must have known that if I conceded, I would eventually be paid back in good karma.

Edward wasn't the only one with ulterior motives, it seemed.

And to think it'd all started with one, less-than-innocent question Edward had been on the receptive side of. Some bothersome curiosity of mine I wanted to satiate. Never again, Bella. I'd never, in my wildest dreams, thought I'd end up undressing in bed with Edward having no ambition to touch me.

I had long since made peace with the fact I was out of my mind - what else would you expect from a person who fit right in among vampires and werewolves? - but I couldn't help but think I really had lost my marbles this time. This time.. I couldn't back out. I wouldn't allow myself. It was all or nothing. I had my accountability to think about. This was one dare I massively didn't want to flake on.

Even if that dare included touching myself in front of Edward. For Edward. While he kept his hands to himself.

As the over-sized t-shirt I'd snuck past Alice's uniform dress-code for our honeymoon shrugged off my shoulders, I became flustered, my cheeks burning a deep pink. I wasn't actively happy about it. I _didn't_ want to do this. I was fast convincing myself this was going to be horrible, that I would inevitably embarrass myself.

Doing this, _masturbating_, deliberately in front of him felt naked. Humiliating. And while I felt that way, I already knew I was being ridiculous. I'd had no clothes on in front of him numerous times in the last few weeks, and there I was, reverting back to the blushing, self-conscious bride I would have happily abandoned.

My back thumped onto the mattress with a huff and a pout upward. The bed and ceiling might have been the ones faced by my wrath, but there was no mistaking who they were intended for. This wasn't how I'd imagined spending the day at _all_ when I woke up. "I don't know what's possessing me to do this," I muttered darkly, hoping he'd get the hint and ask me to stop before he felt sorry for me.

It fell on deaf ears. "Bella," he pleaded, voice maintaining its silkiness. "For me?" I was a sucker for when he unleashed the power of his eyes on me, and that's exactly what he did. Leaned in toward me, brushed the hair from my face, and looked at me in a way that often left me breathless.

I cursed him in my head.

"The pants have got to go," he demanded. Nagged, if you asked me, but that's the whole point of demands - there's no asking involved.

"Hold your horses, I'm getting there." My hands hesitated at my hips, but did as I said, shimmying my pajama pants down my legs. Goosebumps rose in their wake. Heater or not, Alaska was Alaska. "And since when did--"

From impatient to deviously entertained, Edward's smile and the cluck of his tongue stopped me. I followed his eyes. To my own horror. The underwear I was currently appareled in were a mess of white and pink poke-a-dots, cut like girl boxers, barely covering my backside. No wonder I was cold.

I hadn't realized the theme when I'd pulled them on this morning after my shower, being less than concerned with my clothing. I'd been in such a hurry just to convince Edward to take it all off again that it mattered little to me in the grand scheme of things what my outfit looked like.

"Alice," I groaned, slapping a hand to my forehead. The impact of the wedding ring I had momentarily forgotten about to my skin stung, and I winced. My recovery came with a blush. Edward was watching me with a good-natured expression, but I got the feeling that underneath that facade, he was laughing at me.

"Do you want me to do this or not?"

The light in his amber eyes developed into concern.

Fighting another blanch, I sighed, rubbing my face in dread and preparation. "That's what I thought." My fingers slipped into the flashy garment Alice had bought on my behalf, fingering the flimsy piece of fabric that covered me from him. My eyes darted up through their lashes to Edward. Just his concentration on me, as if he'd never seen anything more fascinating, enhanced my blush. I began pushing it down--

"Wait."

I blinked. Was Edward having second thoughts about this? I braced myself for the huge blow my self-esteem was about to take.

On his knees, he shifted toward me until he was inches from me. Propped on my elbows, I froze in place. Very carefully, he lifted his hands, placing them on my hips before they ran up the planes of my stomach, pausing to cup my breasts and trigger a reaction from me. My quiet breathing broke to a gasp. I very rarely wore bras anymore. There was no one to cover my shame for, unless you counted Edward. I didn't.

He stopped, sweeping my hair behind the shell of my ears, then dropped his hands and retreated. I could have wept in frustration, an ache beginning inside me. "Now," he said, indicating I should continue by myself.

My hands shook as I pulled the remaining piece of clothing off, purposefully chucking it at him and missing. He tried to not grin at me.

"Bad aim," I muttered.

It was awkward from there on out. At a loss of how to start, I shifted onto my back, my legs together. Edward sighed exasperatedly at me, telling me to stop being shy, that I had no reason to be, and with some convincing, got me to open my legs. Once he was satisfied with the view, I ended up reclined against the pillows.. trying to resist the urge to cry.

Both he and I were well aware how much I'd prefer him having been doing this for me, his fingers the ones smoothing up my thighs to substitute for my own clumsily passing over my stomach. His cold hand would have pressed against what felt like the hottest part of me. Edward knew my body better than I did. For some reason I didn't understand, he wanted to demonstrate I could bring myself the same shower of pleasure _without_ his aid.

"I don't do it as good as you do," I complained, my eyes down as I stimulated myself. I didn't trust myself to look at him without bolting.

"Oh?" His speech seemed more strained than I remembered. "You're doing just fine, from what I can see."

I took a deep breath and tried to forget his presence and focus on the sensation that would unglue me, dedicating my energy to the ecstasy I sought. I slipped in one finger, then a second. I thought of the times he'd touched me here before, bringing me over the edge as he murmured in my ears. Finding a rhythm I appreciated, my breathing quickened.

There was a quick intake of breath in the room that wasn't my own. Opening my eyes, I realized Edward had gone from sitting in a chair to the foot of the bed again. "Slow down," he requested. "This is going to be over too soon."

I might have been stubborn as hell, but more often than not, I came around when it concerned Edward. Especially if it happened to combine Edward _and_ sex. All it took for me to switch teams from reluctant to passionately willing was a look at him and what effect I had over him. He was rewarding me with an expression that pumped up my courage and determination. My bloodstream might as well have been instantaneously flooded with a sedative that left me high and delirious.

My participation doubled, my fingertips locating my breast. His eyes darkening to liquid midnight, Edward sucked in another deep, low breath. He could see the flush on my skin more clearly now, the sheen of sweat I knew to be all over me.

Eyes shutting, my hips rose and fell of their own accord. I was racing to catch up with the pleasure that was outrunning me. My insides felt like they had tangled themselves up like wires. I was a bomb. I had no clue which wire to cut to ensure the pressure mounting inside of me exploded.

It was deliciously maddening.

I let the feeling take me. Edward didn't lend a helping hand at all, but I reached the finish line soon after. My climax shot through me like a rocket. My head snapped back, body going board-straight, hips raised. I wasn't disappointed.

Once the tension expired to bliss and I could safely say I was back on planet earth, Edward spoke up.

"Bella?"

"Mmmmm."

"Silly girl." Edward's voice lilted somewhere that felt distant to me as my breathing slowed toward regularity. Before I could reach out, he was beside me, lifting my body so he could fit underneath it and cradle me to him. I molded into his side. Hand entwined in my hair, he kissed the top of my head. "That wasn't so bad, now was it?"

Sated and too tired to find his smugness irritating, I nodded lazily. "Now it's your turn."

"Not so soon."

"Yes, soon," I argued. A poor attempt of a growl left my mouth. I felt his chuckle more than heard it.

"Calm down. You'll be.." He smirked into my hairline. "Compensated."

"You bet your butt I will be."

"You are the most stubborn thing I've encountered." That was a redundant comment, but not persuading me any. As if he knew what I was thinking, Edward sighed at me. "Would it do any good if I promised?"

I peeked up at him. "Do you promise on the Volvo?"

He hesitated, and I gave him my best deadpan look. "If it reassures you... fine."

Well, that was one way to make sure he wasn't bluffing. "Okay, I believe you," I relented, the fight fleeing me. Content and sleepy, I buried myself into his arms. Under the surface, my mind was churning away. I eluded it and the disgruntlement that I'd finished what I'd started. And to think Edward enjoyed it, and.. _I_ had enjoyed it.

I shook off the thought.

Stupid, voyeuristic husband.

*****

Here endeth the lesson.

Interesting fact: the French call an orgasm "the little death" -- fitting, right? I also thought it was appropriate because Bella has to suck it up and get over her comfort zone.


End file.
